what if u had an identical twin that did porn and u like went to the grocery and theyre like “omg i saw u take 3 dicks at once while wearing a turtle costume” and ur like “god dammit gary”
- me after eating one healthy meal: i wonder how much weight I've lost
I’m not… Fearless. I’m terrified. I’m always terrified. I act like I know what I’m doing, but I don’t. I don’t know if Isaac is dying right now. I don’t know if I made a mistake with Scott. I don’t know what my dad is thinking. I don’t know if we should trust Derek. I don’t know… I don’t know anything.
alphabet soup more like times new ramen am i right
you’ve got 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up scenarios in your head that you’re stressing about for absolutely no logical reason
the fault in our stars
what if instead of saying “can you google it”
we used bing or yahoo?
"hey can you yahoo this for me"
"idk man, bing it"
PROTECT CUTE BOYS WHO MAKE BAD PUNS AT ALL COSTS